Finding My Way Back Home #4
I might be crying behind my computer screen right now... This one is hard because it was so recent and breaks my heart. Just before Christmas after a lot of thought and prayer decided it was time for me to leave my job at the high school where I was the assistant athletic trainer. I know like this might seem like a lame post so sorry in advance but I feel that I need to write about it.
I started out loving my job because it was what I had studied years to do and what I felt I was meant to do. But slowly it became more of a burden than a joy. I started stressing out about just going into work. The one thing that kept me coming back was the athletes ("my kids") who I loved and cared for. I knew that they needed me and that most of them wanted me there, but most days that still did not feel like enough to keep going back for.
After a very rough night at work where I made some mistakes (yes I am admitting that I am not perfect) and where things were said and done that were not so nice, I came home feeling terrible. I spoke with Drew (my husband), my mother and best friend and began to work things out in my mind. But I was still missing a conversation with the person who will love me no matter what, my Father in Heaven. That night I spent a lot of time praying and reading scriptures searching for advise or even better an answer to what I should do. The song "Count Your Blessings" came to mind. In the first verse it says " Count your any blessings; name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord has done." I found this very comforting and began to mentally count my blessings. I realized that by remaining in the stressful and unhealthy environment I was not taking full advantage of some of my many blessings. At that moment I knew that it would be hard but that I had to leave the job behind and find that which the Lord is still trying to bless me with.
To all of "my kids" if you are reading this know that I love you and still support you in all you do. Please know that you are not the reason I left but the reason I stayed as long as I did.
Blessed and Relieved,
Jenna
I started out loving my job because it was what I had studied years to do and what I felt I was meant to do. But slowly it became more of a burden than a joy. I started stressing out about just going into work. The one thing that kept me coming back was the athletes ("my kids") who I loved and cared for. I knew that they needed me and that most of them wanted me there, but most days that still did not feel like enough to keep going back for.
After a very rough night at work where I made some mistakes (yes I am admitting that I am not perfect) and where things were said and done that were not so nice, I came home feeling terrible. I spoke with Drew (my husband), my mother and best friend and began to work things out in my mind. But I was still missing a conversation with the person who will love me no matter what, my Father in Heaven. That night I spent a lot of time praying and reading scriptures searching for advise or even better an answer to what I should do. The song "Count Your Blessings" came to mind. In the first verse it says " Count your any blessings; name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord has done." I found this very comforting and began to mentally count my blessings. I realized that by remaining in the stressful and unhealthy environment I was not taking full advantage of some of my many blessings. At that moment I knew that it would be hard but that I had to leave the job behind and find that which the Lord is still trying to bless me with.
To all of "my kids" if you are reading this know that I love you and still support you in all you do. Please know that you are not the reason I left but the reason I stayed as long as I did.
Blessed and Relieved,
Jenna
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